An Interview with Personal Coach Roy Biancalana

Written By Karen LeBlanc

Whether you want to find the love of your life, get your current relationship going again, or turn a good relationship into a great relationship, a good Personal Coach and relationship expert can help you do just that. Personal relationship coaches generally support people in uncovering the unconscious patterns, beliefs and commitments that keep them from creating the intimate relationships they desire. Gates of Seminole recently spent time with Roy Biancalana – Personal Coach and relationship expert – learning more about how he helps numerous individuals and couples reclaim their happiness and create positive relationships in their personal and professional lives.

Roy, what is a Life Coach?

A Life Coach is someone experientially trained and professionally capable of supporting people in creating the life they want. My focus is on creating great relationships. And that comes about as people commit to their own personal growth which then transforms their relationships.

How did you get involved in Life Coaching as a profession?

I have been working in the personal growth field for over 20 years. But after going through a divorce and several unfulfilling relationships, I hired a Life Coach to help me discover how I was bringing suffering into my life. And after a lot of blood, sweat and tears, I have a great relationship with an incredible woman. I am now the poster child for Life Coaching! It’s changed my life.

Typically, who hires a Life Coach?

Some of my clients come to me after trying to talk to somebody such as a therapist and find themselves still stuck. They don’t know how to break the negative cycle. Single people come to me asking why they keep attracting the same kind of person and experiencing the same relationship struggles. Couples often fight about the same things. For example, often the man is distracted with his projects or is disinterested in talking about how to make the relationship better. The woman wants a deeper connection – but he views her desire as nagging and he pulls further away. The push-pull cycle never ends. But it can.

How is coaching different from therapy?

In my experience, therapy is about the past and focuses on “why” questions. It creates insight but not necessarily freedom. Tomorrow doesn’t change just because you understand yesterday. Coaching is about the future and asks “what” and “how” questions. Questions like “What am I doing to create this situation” or “How can I respond differently” are quantum, life changing questions. They take responsibility, they empower and they bring freedom and transformation.

How does Life Coaching work?

I have clients all over the country so most of my coaching is done over the phone. It works great! You don’t have to leave your home or office, there’s no getting ready and there’s no travel time. My clients rave about it!

Typically, I work with people in monthly segments of four one-hour sessions. There is a high degree of trust and rapport needed between a client and a coach. And that takes time. So I strongly encourage monthly packages, though I do individual sessions.

In addition to the four sessions per month, I offer my clients “help!” calls. Many of my clients call me, daily sometimes, for 15 minutes to talk about an issue or an emotion they’re experiencing in the moment. “Help!” calls are like calling a time-out in a basketball game to talk to the coach about what’s happening. What good is having a therapy appointment Thursday when you’re having a big fight with your partner Sunday? In my coaching practice, you can call right in the middle of a fight or any other experience. It’s incredibly transformative.